He's Going to leave

Yes, he's going to leave sooner. I know, this is really crazy to feel this way but I couldn't help it. Too bad i wasn't really careful that i lost my heart again, somehow.
Yes, this is really crazy. i want to just stop the time from moving, the days from coming. It feels like a part of me would be taken away, again.
Yes, he's just been a part of my life for a short time. But he made me feel some emotions that elicited my creativity. Somehow, in his own unique, natural and special ways, he has become my inspiration. The reason in some ways why I held on to something that I couldn't stand.
Whenever I see him, i feel the rush of adrenalin and endorphin inside me. It seems like an "upper" has been injected to me. Do i sound like an obsessed creature? No, I'm not. I just admire him this much.
Now, he's leaving. I'll be sad for sure, my days there wherever I am right now will never be the same again but I must continue what I've started. I'll leave that place also sooner or later but his memories will linger. They will always stay. In time, what I feel for him now will fade away but the feeling of happiness his memories will bring will never will.
I think, nowadays, whenever we have the chance to talk, i don't let it pass me by without staring at his face. I'm just trying to memorize his profile. i don't want to forget his lovely face. I want to keep every inch of it in my mind.
Hah! I think I'm becoming a hopeless romantic fool here again. But this is what I'm feeling now. I'm just so elated that i want to jump. My goodness, just the mere sight of him takes my breath away. I know, my heart belongs to someone else but that didn't prevent me from admiring him that much.
I hope we'll see each other again in the future. I hope that I'll see his lovely face again. His beautiful eyes, his kind countenance.

I Am Under Testing Times

Well, these past few days, lots of things have been going on my head that I could almost feel the intense production of cortisol in my brain. By the way, cortisol according to the med world, if i'm not mistaken is the "harmful" hormone released by a certain gland in there that stimulates pain or stress. But whatever it is, I still feel weird and anxious and you know, a little complicated. Not that i am becoming negative here only that there have been so many things and happenings that have transpired in my life in a span of few months that make my consciousness spiral down towards jaded feelings. I don't know. Even while I'm doing this now, I feel that words just want to come out but which among them wants to come out first? They are rushing like a turbulent river but they are like diffusing sparks going here and there, with no definite direction. I just want to write. I just want to put into words my complex emotions. Maybe, I'm just under testing times. I've noticed that from time to time, I feel this way and when the ordeal is over, it's like a new persona has emerged. A new facet of my personality has come out. Whether it's for the better of for worst, I'm not sure only that I know a new wisdom has sprouted. Just like the proverbial "wisdom tooth", its coming is just so heck-a-painful but then once out, considered to be a valued asset of the mastication tool. Hehehe....
I don't know. I have so many questions inside. But to whom should I ask them? A question answered by a question. What an irony. Anyway, maybe this is the process called "maturity". I must accept now that I'm not getting any younger anymore and time passes me by. There will be more happy times to bring out the crazy clown out of me and disappointments to knock my head off.But still, I will find myself breathing and awake knowing i must face another challenge. Anyway, maybe this is how it is to be a human. Atleast, i think I am. Hehehehehe